Director: Jon Turteltaub
Year: 2018
Rated PG-13
Rating: * 1/2 Stars
Cast: Jason Statham, Li Bingbing, Rainn Wilson
A prehistoric shark nestled at the bottom of the Pacific Ocean, makes its way to the surface to feast on residents of Sanya Bay and a group of la-di-da scientists. It's up to rescue diver Jonas Taylor (played Jason Statham) to save the day and of course narrowly avoid getting eaten. That's the rub of 2018's The Meg, a science fiction thriller that disregards B-movie fun and entertainingly dumb, summer fun. In truth, "Meg" may be big and loud but it's one hollow spectacle rifled with messy ideals. Somewhere author Peter Benchley is probably rolling in his grave and Steven Spielberg is royally shaking his head.
So yeah, the title of The Meg refers to a Megalodon. It's an extinct species of shark that lived millions and millions of years ago. The Megalodon in "Meg" kills a few people but you never view any blood or carnage. You just see human casualties faintly disappear or kinda get swallowed up (hence the weak, PG-13 rating). I never thought I'd say this but watching The Meg made me yearn for something more like 2010's Piranha 3D. "3D's" no masterpiece but at least it confirms that people actually become fish food in the hands of nasty, tooth-like creatures.
Anyway, The Meg gives us direction by John Turteltaub that contains choppy editing (no pun intended), unnecessarily infused humor, and an inconsistency in the avenue of storyboards (every pseudo, heart rendering sequence seems to randomly pop up or flow unevenly). Also, "Meg" saddles the audience with the odd casting choice of Jason Statham in the lead. After seeing "Meg", I realized that Statham is better off doing another Expendables or Transporter sequel. Yeah he may be decent in many butt-kicking action scenes. However, JayBird has never had much in the way of screen presence with the dude possessing about 1-2 facial expressions total (sorta like Dwayne Johnson if you know what I mean).
In retrospect, The Meg feels like just another Jaws ripoff with updated special effects, less suspense, and a larger specimen of great white on the cocky prowl (yup, you're gonna need a much bigger boat). The characters that "Meg's" shark reeks havoc on are unappealing and ones you don't really want to root for to survive. As for the headlining shark itself, well it may be up to 60 feet in length but it has the attested personality of a gnat. Bottom line: This "Meg" is truly a bad "egg". My rating: 1 and a half stars.
Written by Jesse Burleson
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